Wednesday, January 25, 2012

One Year Ago Today...

...I very nearly lost my girl.  It was at this time exactly.  And I'm very, very thankful that I didn't!  A few things have changed since that post...

...I'm much more confident in myself as Abby's caregiver now than I was when that happened, just a week after we first brought her home!  I'm such a different person now than I was a year ago.

...The nurse who was a "keeper" turned out to be a "fire-er."  She was the first of 11. :o/

...We haven't gone back to our local hospital since that day, choosing instead to drive straight to JHH whenever we've needed to go to the ER.  Unless an ambulance is necessary (like it was a year ago), this is what we will continue to do.  JHH knows Abby, knows trachs and vents, and knows complex medical conditions.  Amen.

...We've gotten to know the nurses in the IMC pretty well!  I don't know if that is a good thing or not...

I've mentioned it before, but it's hard to describe the memory I have of that day.  The image of her lying there will be forever etched in my mind.  I have never been so scared in my life, and that includes the few days before Abby got her trach.  It was the most terrifying experience I've ever had because I thought I was watching my daughter die right in front of me.

But she didn't, and for that I am extremely grateful to God!  He gave us (my nurse and me) wisdom and quick-thinking on that day, and He got Abby safely to JHH where she was able to be treated by the experts. 

It's not something I ever want to experience again.  EVER.  The memories are still as fresh if they happened a day ago rather than a year ago.  But the same God who pulled Abby through that experience would be there if it happened again.

I'm soooo glad I can't see the future!  I would be a hand-wringing, comfort-rocking, nail-biting, nervous wreck!!!

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