Life as a Leach

Fear grips me at the most untimely  of times. Like sitting at a funeral, when I find myself considering the idea that I could be planning one for my daughter instead of she planning one for me...the way it should  be. Like when Abby is kicking a soccer ball around with the other toddlers while the big kids have soccer practice, and I gasp as she gets knocked down.  Just how strong are those ribs now? Like waking at the sound of every single cough on the monitor, wondering if it is going to turn into something more. Like seeing her gag on some food, praying that she doesn't aspirate on it.  What is "going down the wrong pipe" for most kids is a constant threat of pneumonia for mine. Like being asked what Abby's prognosis is, and having to say that I really don't know.  Then having to explain that her syndrome is so rare that there really isn't a prognosis.  She is pretty much making her own path here. Like singing "You Are My Sunshine" ...

Not Mommy's first day back to work!! Yes, today starts a new chapter in my life!  I'm actually very excited--and a little nervous--about my new position.  I'm also worried about leaving Abby with our nursing situation being what it is.  I think Abby's a little worried too, judging by her face here. Now it's your turn!  Make up a fabulous caption for this photo!  My favorite caption will win their choice of either a Lock & Lock "I'm Not a Paper Cup" travel mug (can't find the link for this to save my life!) or a Lock & Lock travel tea mug . To be a bit more fair and so no one thinks I'm choosing favorite people (after all, you're allllll my favorite people!) :), I will read them anonymously to Matt and he will have the final say in the winner.  The contest will end on August 21st at 10:00 p.m.  You can leave your caption here, on Facebook, or in an email.  Write as many as you like!  Happy captioning!

I am a worrier.  It's just what I do.  And the worry button is on overload these days. Paul...you know, in the Bible...must not have been thinking of people like me when he wrote, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything through prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7. I love that verse.  I really do.  I've long-since had it memorized and repeat it to myself often, but it doesn't help an old worrier like me too much.  It's a constant struggle.  And I've got plenty to worry about these days: ...I worry about Abby having a good life and not one full of pain. ...I worry that Caleb is going to miss out on things as he grows up ...I worry that I will be so busy with the technical side of Abby's care that I will miss the fun stuff ...I worry about all of the surgeries we'll be facin...