Saturday, June 11, 2011

A New Chapter

As you may already know, I was offered a part-time position on Thursday.  I accepted it, so next year I will be between 4 schools doing staff development with teachers on strategies they can use with their ELL* students.

*English Language Learners

Let me back up a bit though.  Back in February, I put in for a transfer to a part-time middle school position.  I took my reading/language arts Praxis (the BIG test I mentioned) and then had to wait.  In May, I found out that there just really weren't any positions in the middle school.  My chances were pretty slim.  I decided that I would be full-time next year, and felt good about it because I love my school, love my team, and love my job!  Somehow, we'd make it work.

Then, I randomly found out about this ELL position two weeks ago and it was suggested that I email the person overseeing the program.  I did, but after not hearing back, I figured it was a dead end.  Again, I figured I'd be full-time next year. 

Then the tornado came in and all of the sudden I talked to 20 different people in the course of a few days, ending with an offer on Thursday!  I walked out of the room where I took the call to a waiting team--with a shocked look on my face!  It all happened so quickly!

This is what I've prayed for...for sooooo long!  So why am I feeling a bit torn?  It sounds perfect to you, doesn't it!?  I'll explain!

The positives of this job:  I make my own hours.  If Abby has a doctor's appointment, I just don't work on that day.  I can do a couple of full days a week, daily hours, or a combo.  It's a very flexible schedule!  Plus, if I do need to be out at the last minute...no sub plans!!  (My teacher friends can relate to the awesomeness of this one!)  I also get to work with a good friend of mine who used to be at my school.  She is also part-time, and I really admire her as a teacher.  I'm excited to work with her again!

The downside (not negatives...just a little difficult):  I have to leave my school.  :(  This has hit me so hard!  After the excitement of the opportunity wore off, I spent an hour on Thursday crying.  My school has been so awesome this year (every year, but especially this year!), and it's all I've ever known as a teacher.  I'll miss my team and the friends I've made.  My principal has been phenomenal to me this year, and I'll miss her.  I'm also sad that I will not be working very often directly with kids.  I'll do testing on them, but most of my interactions will be with staff.  I'll also be traveling between 4 schools, which means I won't have the support of a team and a feeling of unity.  I'm sure that will be an adjustment.

I'm really excited about this position, and ELL is something I've been interested in for a while.  It was actually my original master's program (before they couldn't get enough people to offer classes down here so I'd have to go to Baltimore for all of them--no thanks!)  It is certainly bittersweet though.

Matt helped me process everything on Thursday and I finally came to realize this:  I wish that it didn't have to be this way.  I have wanted to be part-time or a stay-at-home-mom for a long time, but I hadn't thought it would be under these circumstances. 
But I also know that I need to do what is best for my family.  Right now, this is it!!  My schedule will allow me to go to Abby's many appointments, be here for therapy, and manage the nurses.  I'm thankful that I will have more time for all of that, because working full-time in this situation is stressful.  I would do it, but it's hard.

So yeah...that's me...feeling a little bit torn...but excited for a new beginning.  I've had a lot of change in my life this last year, so what's a little bit more?!

Now I'm on to packing up my room and storing 8 years of stuff.  Thank goodness my grandmother is letting me put it in her basement!!  :)

Please pray for me as I make this adjustment.  It's a big one!

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