Monday, July 9, 2012

You Might Have Home Nursing If...

Your nurse that you love sees that you are on Facebook late at night, so you come down for a cup of coffee.

You tell your nurse that you don't need a doctor's order to have a well-deserved moment with your child.

You have been marked as the parent who hovers...aka, the parent who holds her baby and loves her!

You finally get the most amazing team of nurses...and then one of them gets pregnant and the other one gets an amazing hospital job--and you are truly happy for them.

You can identify the tiredness that comes over everyone at 4 a.m. and understand their Red Bulls and candy they bring nightly--as well as occasionally finding them with their eyes closed, holding your baby's hand.

The nurse has to remind the doctor and other nurses that you are the mother, and not their daughter.

You are told, "Oh, no, it's just allergies!" and lo and behold, two days later, you, your child, and your husband now have the so-called allergies and that nurse has called in sick.

You come downstairs in the morning and every single light is on, even though you know it's been hours since anyone has been down there.

You have to make rules about what to do when your other child wakes up in the middle of the night...and then they aren't followed anyway.

Your male nurse states that YOU can't change your SON'S diaper, just because he is a boy.

Your nurses try to do everything in the dark because they are afraid to turn the lights on.

You have to tell the nurse your child can come in the living room with the rest of the family.

You assure a nurse that you do, in fact, know how to feed your child by mouth and that you don't need her to hover over you watching anxiously for signs of aspiration.

A fabulous friend and most trusted confidant shows up at your door every morning wearing scrubs and a stethoscope.

You have ever been told that your trached child couldn't possibly take a bath in a bath tub with...gasp...water in the bottom of it!!

On the first night without night nursing, you yell, "Hey, look at me!  I'm locking the front door for the first time in three years!"

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